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Weekly Marriage Blog

When Apart, Be Positive

By Dr. David Clarke, Ph.D

The Big Idea

Prepare to talk with your spouse by thinking positive thoughts about him/her. 

The Teaching

The cycle of intimate communication begins before you ever sit down to talk. Whenever you're apart, fill your mind with positive thoughts about your partner.  As you dwell on your sweetheart's wonderful qualities, your feelings of love will intensify.  You will get excited about seeing your special person. 

Shulamith, Solomon's wife, demonstrates this positive thinking method at the very beginning of the Song of Solomon.  She is alone, and she is thinking very positive thoughts about Solomon.  She loves his kisses(1:2), adores his lovemaking(1:2), is intoxicated by his scent(1:3), and believes everything about him has a beautiful fragrance(1:3).  

Now, if you are a wife, it may be a challenge to dwell positively on your man's scent.  You'll have to use your imagination.  Research has shown that two persons are attracted to each other, in part, by smell.  So, go with that.  

When you were dating, all the positive thoughts you had about each other created intense feelings of love and passion, right?  Get back to doing this!  It will reenergize your love and get you warmed up for your times of communication. 

Next week, more on communication.  These current blogs are based on my book:  The Top Ten Most Outrageous Couples of the Bible.  On April 30 and May 1, Focus on the Family re-aired two radio shows with me talking about this book.  You can hear these shows(and who wouldn't want to?) by going to the Focus on the Family site. 

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